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Tuesday, February 3, 2009

FROM A MALES PERSPECTIVE

Why can’t I be single?


For some reason whenever I meet someone and or run into an old school or work mate, and they ask me my status and I say I am single, it’s a big o I know your lying.
So I think to myself what could it be, is liar marked on my forehead? For some reason this always turn me off from a new girl, please get to know me, before you judge me.
I have bin single for one year now and at most I chose to be single, mainly because I did not think I was ready for a serious relationship.

But of late I am getting the feeling that I am ready for some one who is serious; I am really getting tired of being single and messing with random people. There is nothing like having someone special to share your life with, boy finding that someone is not always an easy job. I don’t really do dating sites, when I was in college I use to meet allot of people on MySpace and some other social sites, but as I said I was not read to settle down I was unstable and just wanted t have fun.

I read allot if females profile on here that are really smart and seem attractive, but they all suffer from lack of man syndrome, so I am here hoping to find an educated, beautiful, and someone who has a good sense of humor, and they on the other hand is searching for the same of the opposite sex, so I came to the conclusion that there are men out there, females just need to look in the right places. Another thing is that you guys are not going to find a man that has the whole package; I am not suggesting that you settle for less.

I know it’s hard to find a young educated man, that is not already married or has a girl. At times we are in a relationship and one simple thing happen and we just let go, letting go is not always the best thing to do, I have done it and today I wish I did not. We as human need to learn how to work out our differences (however if its severe let it go, don’t stay if you being abuse in any way or form) no one is perfect and if you can find it in your heart to forgive someone then do it, it might now work out in all cases but in some it will.

Men do cheat, is it right? Well I will leave you to decide that. Females might have the perception that males cheat because they don’t respect their feeling, but that’s not always the case. People cheat for different reasons and the funny enough some guys cheat for no reasons, an often this is the worst thing to understand, I know you might be saying what you mean by no reason. But the relationship could be as good as gold and a man still cheat, sex life might be great, financial life might be great, communication is good. But them the guys still cheat. I know this leaves females baffled and they often think there is no hope in men. But there is a thing call TIME. When a man is just not ready to settle down, there is nothing you can do to keep him at bay, and I say it again nothing.

A guys mentally is totally different, females often meets a guy, fall in love and say they want to spend the rest of their lives with this guy, for males its not necessarily the same.
A man has to feel that’s its time to settle down, and this feeling come in every ones life at a different age, some early ,some late, and some too late.

I have met some great females in my life, but at the time I was just not ready to settle down, I was really not, and I was honest enough to tell them, some were hurt by my honesty and some were happy I came straight forward and told them.
However most men, don’t have the guts to do this, because of many reasons, and the most selfish one is that, they wont get in the panties if they tell you guys the truth, which is not always the case. So instead of rushing in a relationship with a guy and getting hurt try to find out where the guys mind is, its simple but could be complicated if your kind of slow. One of the simple and obvious things that girls miss it this, you are with a guy any every serious plan he makes he says HE, and not WE, that mean your simple not important, get that in your head.

If your with a guy and he is buying something such as a house or car and your not involve, and your input don’t matter, get with it your not important.

If a guy is very conservative in spending money on you, chances are he doesn’t think much of you. Don’t get me wrong if he can’t afford to take you to Paris that’s different.
When I am dating someone I can see a future with I go all out, on the other had if I don’t think its going to work out, I am not going too hard on my pocket.

So I am suggesting this one little thing before you rush in a relationship try to get to know where in life the person is, because not because a guy is 50 years of age mean he is ready, and not because he is 22 mean is cant be ready, each man is different. I am happy I started at a tender age, so my adventure is now over and I am looking forward to find someone to really enjoy what life has to offer.

Its black history month so i have to include at least a pic in each post this month.PICTURE BELOW BOB MARLEY THE GREATEST REGGAE ARTISTE OF ALL TIME (

ONE LOVE - BOB MARLEY
Photobucket

To be continued:

9 comments:

OmegaRadium said...

I'm with you man! Sometimes guys just aren't ready to settle down, despite how great the woman he's found. I know I wasn't ready, and it cost me a great and irreplaceable girl.

Thanks to all the various experiences with females in my life,I now feel that I am closer than ever to being ready for a serious relationship, more than I was a few years ago.

Best of luck in your search!

Unbreakable said...

Thanks Omega

dannie said...

thank you for your blog comment !

Rachel said...

I never tell people I am single - I either blatantly ignore the question, or change the subject dramatically, for example:

"Rachel, are you seeing anyone?"

"What, I can't hear you...hey, it that a llama over there, or a cab driver?"

Works everytime.

Unbreakable said...

Racheal thats funny, maybe i need to adopt that one. lol

HeavenBlessing? said...

I appreciate this blog. Usually I post long drawn out posts, but this one I can keep short and sweet...hopefully. This is great, I hope Im not suffering from the "No man syndrome" lol. But its going on 5 months and Im starting to enjoy my first time of being single. I think back on my last abusive relationship and you didnt mention about men who "flip-flop" my ex would say we and then he, I dont know...but I guess thats why I left him. Thanks for the post.

ps. I heard online dating sites are fabulous. My friend found her a great girl. Im thinking about joining too. People think those site are strictly for older, unattractive etc. etc. But Im gonna give it whirl and Im young and fabulous...lol.

~*Miss A*~ said...

Because the "traditional" world (for some stupid ass reason) expects people our age to be married, starting a family, and all that other shit. For some people that works, it just clicks, for others, personal success is first then marriage & family comes later. I want to be able to live my life, travel, and have lots of fun experiences before settling down. That's just my take ;)

ill;kinda said...

I love how you said 'lack of man syndrome' some women like to weed men out before really getting to know the real him. and chances are 8 out of 10 guys ARE lying when they say they are single. It's difficult to truly find someone in today's society just because of the way of the world. Men & women, two from the same specimen, but when delved in deeper two totally different species ! Do you get where i am coming from? Maybe girls just want to protect their hearts. If you're persistent maybe she will lighten up & maybe just maybe give you her number.
Don't hound her though, you'll come off too strong and she will run for the hills, but give her a little bit of reassurance that you're a good guy. Maybe ask to let her show you that you're not involved or something... good post :)

Experience is the best teacher. said...

I like this post...

I hate when guys ask "So why are you single?"

I just spew off some bs about being in a changing place b/c I'm headed off to law school and don't know if I'll end up on the other side of the country.

But I think the real reason is that 1. I don't meet anyone who has the things I find important in relationships, and 2. I'm still slightly bitter :-)